Happy Fall

We love to play in the leaves.

Vivi likes to eat the leaves

Happy Fall!

A great cause

My friend's fundraising raffle is up! Please help them bring their daughter home from Ecuador! You could win Ragedy Ann & Andy dolls made by Mom (she also made the cowboy booties and memory bear). Check it out and please help spread the word. All items can be shipped to wherever you are! Go HERE

First snowfall

We had our first snowfall of the season on November 6th. The kids noticed it as we were rushing off to church. They were so sad they couldn't stop and play in it so we promised they could play when we got home. We barely were able to wrestle some boots on them (yes, David's are pink) before they were out the door ready to play.

Modeling his pink boots from his older cousin.

Thank goodness for that shade. It kept us true to our word and left just enough snow that they could play in it after church.

David loves to eat snow.

Lovely lady.

The things one can do in a dress . . .

Lucy's fancy fourth birthday

Lucy's fancy fourth birthday started a few days early with her grandparents coming over for cake and presents.

Such a loved little lady.

The morning of her birthday she go to choose what she wanted for breakfast (toast, strawberries and orange juice) and where she would eat it (by Vivian). And she got to open her present from Vivian and David (a Care Bear)

Then our big girl was off to preschool with the shirt Aunt Kristi made her.

When Dad got home from work, she got to open our present for her. A new bike! She's still a bit nervous to ride it.

Then we all got FANCY for her party!

All of her friends came dressed in their fanciest attire. It was so fun to see them all dressed up. We played "bracelet, bracelet, necklace" (just like duck, duck, goose)

And pin the bow on Lucy

Aunt Jayna helped everyone make a fancy bracelet or necklace to take home.

The whole gang . . .

My favorite part was watching them dance to the ABC's. They were so confident as they all danced and sang with all their hearts. Oh how I hope this sweet innocence lasts a very long time for my children.

Then there was cake-that of course had to be PINK!

Happy birthday to our fancy four year-old, Lucy! We love you!

4 years ago today . . .

This little firecracker stole all of our hearts. We love you Lucy. Happy Birthday! I am so grateful to be your Mom.

Pledge by Lucy

here

Halloween 2011

The day started with preschool at our house. The kids got to wear their costumes, have a parade, read Where The Wild Things Are, decorate trick-or-treat bags, pretend to go trick-or-treating, pretend to pass out treats and they were going to decorate a gourd they picked from our garden, but they were a bit too cold for the stickers to stick to so it turned into a take home activity.

Then Grandma & Grandpa Sampson and Grandma Kay came to have dinner with us and see everyone in their costumes.

Here we are ready to trick-or-treat

Heidi came along for the adventure. Lucy loved her pirate costume.

David's first time trick-or-treating-he loved it! And Lucy was an old pro.

Although David didn't quite understand why we couldn't just stop and eat each candy we were given. He was a bit confused why we just stuck it in a bag and moved on.

And Vivian just enjoyed being outside. She got a bit fussy after we had been out for about an hour (yep, it took us 90 minutes to visit 15 houses!) But then she fell asleep. Such a sweet little Halloween.

Ward Carnival

Such a cute mouse with her cheese

David stole the show as a puppy (he kept saying, "Doggy")

and our cute kitty who of course had to be PINK!

such a happy time!

the cat and mouse

The farmer with his animals

The Farmer in the dell, The Farmer's Wife, the dog, the cat, the mouse and the cheese!

Pumpkin time

This year our garden produced EIGHT pumpkins! After sharing some with friends and family, this is what we did with the rest.  These foam stickers were a hit! The kids loved decorating their pumpkins and could do it very independently. So fun.

David was fascinated with decorating his pumpkin.

Lucy was so pleased with her creation.

David carried his pumpkin all over and was so sad when he couldn't take it to bed with him. When Marc came home he showed it to him and would say, "Ok put it on." Just as I said as I would hand him a new sticker.

Our good friends Heidi and Yvette came over that night to make cookies and carve pumpkins with us.

David was fascinated by the whole carving idea. After Heidi carved this one, he brought me his pumpkin with the stickers on it and said, "Open it."

Even little Vivi was a part of the action. Happy Harvest!

To remember . . .

Lately I have discovered that my mind has been both a dear friend and terrible enemy. I am so thankful for the moments my mind can so vividly recall the moments of sweet Jonah running through my kitchen or playing with David. David always loved to see Jonah. He couldn't resist patting him on top of the head. They had this "game" they'd play where Jonah would make a mess and David would clean it up. All the while David would say, "Clean-up!" while Jonah happily made more and more messes completely oblivious to David's desires to be tidy. I treasure the sweet memories I have of watching Julie lovingly mother Jonah. She was always so aware of his every need. I remember giving Jonah his first hair cut and he kept turning to see what I was doing. Julie was quick to point out that because his hearing aid was off, he probably couldn't tell what was happening to him until I physically touched him. She knew him so well. It was beautiful to see. These thoughts bring me great joy.

And at the same time, I find myself getting so frustrated with my memory. I do not like that I keep having to have this conversation with my mind. It goes something like this: I recall that Jonah passed away and then I have this desperate thought, "No, no it must have all just been a bad dream." Then I must AGAIN remind myself that it wasn't just a dream and I have to validate my thoughts with all the things that have occurred (The ER room, the funeral, visiting with Julie, etc) to lay enough proof for my mind to accept that this really did happen and my poor friend is facing every mother's worst nightmare. It is an emotion I have never before experienced. 

We were told that it takes the brain a full year to comprehend death especially when it is someone you are close to. In a lot of ways this makes sense. I can see how this is your mind's way of helping you deal with something so extreme that if we were capable of understanding it all at once, it would probably be far too much to bear. So in that regard, I thank my mind for easing me in to this understanding. I would imagine when all is said and done, I will be grateful for the TIME it is taking me to travel this road of grief and understanding. I would like to think I will eventually even understand and appreciate my brain for acting in the way it has. For now, I do not fully understand it.

I do know this. I know that I am grateful for nights with little sleep because they are the result of moments I could share with my babies. I know I would rather have the time to play with my two-year-old than the time to take a nap. I know that dear friends are one of the greatest blessings we're given on this earth. I know that I live a charmed life and I need to do a better job at showing my gratitude for it.  I know that life is really really hard. And yet it is through life's trials that we get the opportunity to learn who we really are, who and how we really love and what it means to feel all of the emotions God has blessed us with.

And for all this that I know; I am grateful. I am grateful for the mind that lets me know. The mind that lets me remember the sweetness and shelters me from the sadness. And a brain that lets me know I don't have to know it all. That for now, it's ok to wonder, "Why?" and to be confused. Because above everything else that I know; I know God lives. I trust that He knows. And I know I am His child and it's ok to be confused. He will lead me.